Help! How do I avoid catching feelings? #AskAvery

Meet Avery. She has 8+ years experience as a comedian and 7 years experience as a teenager—and she is here to answer your burning questions about comedy, family, romance, school, and the meaning of life (maybe).  Got a problem you can’t solve or a goal you need help meeting? Ask Avery by DMing @GOLDComedy or emailing info+askavery@gmail.com.

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Dear Avery, 

I’ve been talking to a new boy, as one does, and I’m worried it’s more than just a fling. Do you have any tips for not catching feelings? Also why is catching feelings such a bad thing in the first place? 

Your friend,

Girly McFeely

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Dear GMF, 

I always thought catching feelings is a really funny term. It puts feelings on the same level as diseases. This may be controversial, but I don’t think falling in love is as bad as the plague. Our generation has ultimately decided that feelings are lame and high heels with socks are cool. I think we got it all wrong. Feelings are cool and you heard it here first. If you genuinely like this guy and want to express that, DO IT. If he gets weirded out it’s either because a) he’s grown up in a world that shames men for expressing their emotions and needs therapy or b) he’s gross and weird. Because you’re awesome, obviously. 

However, if you’re just simply not in the mindset for something more, I do have some tips on how to stay distracted.

  1. Stay BUSY. Remember when you actually did schoolwork instead of coming up for reasons on why you haven’t done such schoolwork? Me neither. But I imagine if you did all the work you needed to do, you would be incredibly busy. Not only will this keep your mind occupied away from the boy, you’ll also be freaking smart! 
  2. GO OUT. Those nights you would normally spend spooning in bed like a freak, instead go out and dance with your friends. Your homies miss you, and it’s time to get that pent-up energy out in a different way. Nothing that Britney Spears and a vodka cran can’t fix.
  3. New hobby. Oh yeah, baby, it’s time to expand your personality and interests to make yourself better. Self-improvement (maybe even through comedy!) is the best revenge. Take yourself out and explore! Learn how to crochet those cute shirts I always see on TikTok. Once you have a new hobby you can completely change your personality around it, just like me. 
  4. Become a nun! Who needs men anyway? Just live with your sisters and wear cute dresses and read a book about a hot guy with daddy issues (Jesus). Once you travel to a remote location, you’ll simply spend the rest of your days in celibacy. 

I hope this helps! Cuffing season is approaching so again, if you don’t want to “catch feelings” because of what the world says is okay, screw that. Life is short! 

Love,

Avery