Help! Does LOL stand for Lots of Love? #AskAvery

Dear Avery,

I went to an open mic last week, and let’s just say it was love at first joke. He had the audience, and me, in the palm of his hand and I was laughing up a storm. I haven’t stopped thinking about him since, and wanted to know before I slide into the DMs, what is it like dating a comic? 

Your Friend,

Chuckle Fcker

Dear Chuckle Fcker, 

This is a tale as old as time. Girl meets boy. Girl laughs at boy. Romance ensues. Science tells us that funny people are hotter than non-funnies. Maybe it’s the confidence, the quick conversation skills, or the way they say ‘what’s the deal with….’ that really gets people going. 

Personally, I have never dated a comic. Here’s a short list of why:

  1. I’m too competitive. If he got booked for more shows than me it would be grounds for a breakup. I’m all for supporting my partner, just not when they’re the competition. 
  2. I wouldn’t want to air out all our fights on stage. Couples counseling is hard enough, imagine if it was in front of an audience. And if they took his side…….
  3. Other girls would be in the audience at his shows. I’m not a jealous person but like, why are you trying to make other girls laugh? And don’t get me started on crowd work. 
  4. They might have to travel on the road- you may as well date an NBA player at that point. 
  5. We might bounce material off each other too much. My nightmare is during sex a guy turning to me and saying “But what do you think about THIS punchline.” 
  6. You get to see jokes as they’re being formed, which means having to put up with a lot of not-funny-yet comedy without getting the ick.
  7. They’re busy most weekend nights, so it might be hard to get them to go to that charity event your friend is hosting to save the gorillas in Bushwick when they have a late-night show in Chelsea.  
  8. Do you know how much of an ego you need to think other people should be listening to you talk for 30 minutes straight? 

OK, maybe that’s a longer list than I expected. This is not to say that you, dear reader, shouldn’t date a comic. Comics deserve love, or else they’ll just keep talking about ‘the apps’ and how single they are. Trust me, you’d be doing me a favor. 

 I think the key here is boundaries, or even a signed contract, about what they can and cannot say about you on stage. Even if they joke about your back mole is ‘killer’ you might not feel comfy with it being said in their act. But comedians are generally good at talking about their personal life and opening up, you get to meet a lot of their weird friends, and when they get paid in drink tickets, you’ll have a free margarita.