Meet Avery. She has 8 years experience as a comedian and 7 years experience as a teenager—and she is here to A your toughest Qs about comedy, family, romance, school, and the meaning of life (maybe). Got a problem you can’t solve or a goal you need help meeting? Ask Avery by DMing @GOLDComedy or emailing firstname.lastname@example.org.
I love my girlfriend to death. But I’m also not sure if I wanna be with her that long. Thoughts on dating one person forever?
Till death do us part?
Ah yes, the age-old monogamy question. I’ve been waiting for this one! Is it a choice, or is it…destiny? I do think about which pairs of high school sweethearts are gonna make it to the reunion. I mean, how insane would it be to marry your prom date? The guy you lost your virginity to? Your chemistry partner? It’s too much time for me to comprehend; they knew you in your EMO PHASE.
But then again, hey, who am I to judge? I fuck with romance, (on the low) and won’t even wince when you make a joint Instagram account. I’m making the assumption that most of my readers are young-ish, so why even think about forever? You’re fucking 15-28, probably, and still have so many years to fall in and out of love with idiots before picking one slightly less dumb idiot with whom to spend eternity.
Can I tell you that your high school girlfriend is gonna be your wife? No. I wish! I could probably make a business out of that, or a TV show. Kinda like a Long Island Medium but in Boston and not dead people! I’ll save it for my agent. Back to the point, I can’t make that prediction but I can advise you to live in the damn moment! The time you have with her now will either
- become a great chapter in your novel
- help you figure out what you want in future relationships, or
- just be some fun time you spent connecting with another human on this crazy earth.
So my biggest advice to you is to STOP STRESSING! Go on some crazy adventures and get away with breaking into abandoned places and at least make this relationship some good stand-up material. Live, love, LAUGH, and all that.