GOLD’s 2024 Holiday Gift Guide
They love comedy and you love them. But what does the comedian in your life want this holiday season? It’s hard to figure them out because every time you’re trying to get deep they make fart sounds with their armpit or whatever. This year, sit them down and put on Bob’s Burgers Christmas episodes. Those eps will make your giftee cry–the perfect primer to receive the amazing gift you bought them from this list.
Here we goooooo:
If your funny giftee isn’t fully ready to quit their 9-5 and practice their Wicked impressions all day, they might be comedy curious! Here are some ideas for what goofy gifts they’ll most wanna gab about.
Listen, I want this book. You want this book. The comedian in your life wants this too!
Cheerie Lane Popcorn Variety Pack – $24.49
Movie night!!! Give your sweetie a treatie! Pop these special kernels and then sit your cute butt down in front of the TV for a night of laughs and goofs!
Make writing a little more fun! Gel pens are BACK, baybee!! Add a little glitter to your comedian’s joke scribbles.
Leuchtturm Notebook (B5) – $22.50
Nothing too fancy! Just a rock solid notebook for funny thoughts.
90s babies, unite! 00s babies, welcome my children. I got this notepad a few months ago and I can’t tell you how much fun it makes To Do lists. They can jot down grocery lists, potential bits, or draw tasteful nudes.
Hyper Skin Vitamin C Serum – $36
Comedians have to be hot now! I’m sorry! I don’t like it either! But if your comedian doesn’t have any serums… they need some! Get that pasty freak some goo to make them pretty!
Multi-tool Lighter Sleeve – $13.99
You think this is a stretch, I know. But picture this: They’re at an open mic in Brooklyn. Everyone wants a smoke. Whether or not your person smokes… having a lighter is COOL. Let them be the bro that comes PREPARED. Oh no! Smoke break is over, time to get back on stage but their tag is still on their jacket and there’s kale in their teeth! Don’t sweat it. All thanks to a sneaky multi-tool.
Companion’s Tale Storytelling Game – $36
In this game, players take on the role of a hero’s buddies. Through prompts and drawing out a map of the hero’s life, a story emerges of B-listers with grit. It’s funny, weird, and totally unique–a perfect gifty.
Dropout TV Subscription – $59.99/year
College Humor: DEAD. Dropout: LIVING. This subscription will give the comedian in your life access to watch some of the silliest and most cutting-edge creator-forward comedy content! From Dimension 20 to Very Important People (my personal favorite) to several short form improv shows like Make Some Noise.
Whether they’ve mentioned it or not, the comedian in your life wants to go viral. Maybe this will help.
I think this is a very cool bag. Sometimes all you need to be good at networking is a statement piece.
Does your giftee want to pursue comedy more seriously? Are they unsure how comedy fits into their lifestyle because of work or where they live or how often they choose to watch a 3-hour YouTube documentary about the Star Wars Hotel instead of going to open mics? The GOLD Club is an all-inclusive comedy school and career network. You don’t have to purchase a house to gift them their comedy home. It’s here, at GOLD.
Okay, we’ve made it to the part of the list for the real nerds. You’ve heard of Guy’s Guys. But now there are Comedian’s Comedians. Let’s all raise a glass for the real dorks in our lives and use the other hand to click these links and buy them nifty gifties.
Squarespace Subscription – $16/month
Girl, your friend needs a website. Figure that shit out for them.
Rainbow Chard Hair Claw/Clip – $24.99
Hair clips are IN! Hair clips are FUN! I was going to put a Twilight (2008)-themed hair clip on the list, but decided that’s more about ME than it is about the comedian in your life. So instead…rainbow chard? Pop of color?
Have you been on set in the summer? Have you performed in a crowded comedy theatre? IT GETS HOT!! And comedians…we are a sweaty people.
Leuchtturm Notebook (A4) – $29.50
Get them a big ass notebook for their big ass jokes!
Does your giftee make you watch their sketches/standup sets/web series edit drafts? A chrome cast will let them stream it straight to their TV so they can feel like a big shot. No more worrying if you can get something to play on that big screen!
Make them make their show posters BETTER. Make them make their pitch decks BETTER. This is not spon con…I’m just a loyal customer.
This year I watched as my wife used an entire bottle of Vaseline. Some say it has never been done before. She literally FINISHED a tub. And, in the process, she’s converted me. If your comedian friend is waiting at an open mic, getting nervous, they’ll probably start to notice that their lips are chapped, their elbows are ashy, their hands are cracking…That’s where VASELINE comes in. Lube ‘em up!
Owala Free Sip Insulated Bottle – $18.99
This is a rock-solid water bottle. I don’t leave the house without it. I don’t leave a room without it! Plus, I guess Gen Z is worried about “straw mouth.” Which…honestly I hate that, but this bottle doesn’t give it to you. You’re welcome?
A game of yelling your first thoughts and outdoing your friends! A comedian’s dream evening! Once I was playing this with my family and the prompt was “Medical Profession” and my dad yelled “BLOOD LETTER!!” Instant inside joke. He claims to have read “Medieval Profession,” but I have my doubts.
While we were filming Rat Czar this summer, our (extremely talented) Director of Photography had this monopod. I’m completely obsessed and it’s so cool. The comedian in your life will hopefully think it is cool too. It will help them film those little skits they put online.
Sakura Pigma Micron Pens – $19.99
My friend was visiting last week and she left one of her “fancy” pens behind. I use it constantly now. This is a gift you can give your friend too!
JBL Wireless Microphone – $49.95
Sound quality can make or break a video–any kind. For not very much cash, you can help your giftee make a BIG impact in their video quality! These wireless mics are perfect for people who make content at any level.
Obviously, we understand that there are a lot of comedy schools and workshops out there. We just also know we’re the very best one for women and nonbinary folks. Our courses are taught by legit pros with experience and know-how. Our digital teams are stacked with incredible, professional directors, editors, writers, and actors. Our network is ad-free and provides 24/7 access to a comedy crew. If your giftee is into amazing stuff, they’ll probably love getting the gift of GOLD.